Your self-esteem is the way your view yourself, the way your value yourself, it is also the how important you think you are in the eyes of others and in the eyes of the world. The way you view yourself affects everything about your life, it affects how to will relate with others, it affects your career, I think to a large extent it plays a part in your relationship-deciding the kind of man/woman you want to be with and just how worthy you think you are of them.
Low self-esteem feeds off negative, most times untrue thoughts you have about yourself. It causes you to believe in the awful things people say about you. Low self-esteem causes you to lose your self-confidence.
“Low self-esteem” exists when someone has a general feeling of insignificance or a lack of importance. Someone with low self-esteem is likely to avoid social interactions, feel inadequate in work and struggle to accept criticism. Severely low esteem may also lead to physical symptoms, such as headaches and exhaustion.
According to Overcoming, crucial experiences that help to form our beliefs about ourselves often (although not always) occur early in life. What you saw, heard and experienced in childhood – in your family, in the wider community, and at school – will have influenced the way you see yourself. Examples of early experiences that could lead to your thinking badly of yourself include:
- systematic punishment, neglect or abuse
- failing to meet parental standards
- failing to meet peer-group standards
- being on the receiving end of other people’s stress or distress.
- belonging to a family or social group that other people are prejudiced towards
- an absence of praise, warmth, affection or interest
- being the odd one out, at home or at school.
Karl Perera believes that our self-esteem depends on many questions:
- Is your job worthwhile? Do others respect what you do? Do you?
- Do you believe you are successful?
- How do you see yourself (your self-image or view of you)?
- How do you feel about yourself, and your strengths and weaknesses?
- Are you comparing yourself to others and ignoring the unique value that you have?
- What do you think of your social status?
- How do you relate to others?
- Can you make your own decisions? A lack of choices leads to low levels of self-esteem.
According to PsychSkills, low self-esteem is characterized by:
- Heavy self-criticism, tending to create a habitual state of dissatisfaction with yourself. Exaggerating the magnitude of mistakes or behaviors and not able to reach self-forgiveness.
- Hypersensitivity to criticism leading to feeling attacked and not being open to constructive criticism.
- Chronic indecision due to fear of making mistakes.
- People pleasing.
- Hostility or irritability—easily angered even over minor things.
- Feelings of insignificance.
- General negativity about life and often an inability to enjoy life.
Easy Steps to Raising Your Self Esteem
It is only logical that since the feelings of low self-esteem build up over time, letting go of these feelings will also happen over time. It takes a mixture of consistency, ‘I would not let this feeling get the best years of myself’, a lot of self-love, time, and in some cases counseling to totally be secure in yourself and in who you are.
I have learned that a lot of positive thinking is used to help low self-esteem, these are also called affirmations. Affirmations are positive statements that describe (in this case) how you truly are and not what you have heard or seen, you are to repeat these statements as often as you can, until they get impressed in your subconscious mind. As a man thinketh in his heart so is he, renewing your mind with positive affirmations is a sure way to improve your self-esteem. You renew your mind about who you are through using positive words.
I have listed some positive affirmations that have helped me so far, I am sure they will help you as well:
- I matter
- My glad heart gives me a hapy face
- I am created in the image of God
- I am fearfully and wonderfully made
- In God I live and move and I have all my being
- I am complete in Him
- When He hung on the cross, He saw me
- I am confident
- I can do all things
- I have the spirit of wisdom
- I believe in myself
- I am happy in my own skin
- I am God’s and I matter to him. He calls me by my name.
- God cares about the details in my life. He even knows the number of my hair.
- I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
- With God, I am the apple of His eye.
- I’m engraved in on the palms of God’s hands; my walls are continually before Him.
- I am a unique child of God.
- My light shines brightly.
Please feel free to submit articles on how you overcame your low self-esteem and if you haven’t overcome it, I am here to help.
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